Lonely night...

so as I lay here in my bed about to pass out, I realize I am feeling a bit lonely. 

I have been out on dates with the hot Italian guy and my neighbor quite a few times, but it just doesn't fit what I want/looking for. Then again I wasn't really looking into anything withhot Italian guy or neighbor guy. just some plain 'ol fun.

Am I ready to start actually looking for that "one"? 

I think I am heading in that direction. 

I have yet wanted a serious relationship for the last 4 years...

Last one I had was with my son's father and that was a REALLY serious one.

I am now going to start opening up my heart.

I no longer want to feel as I do right now. I want to cuddle while watching scary movies, runin the rain when it actually rains in AZ, tell stupid jokes to someone who will pretend to laugh at the joke but in reality laughing at me, and most of all I want my children to have a father. 

This is the year of change...

I can feel it...

speaking of change.

Got my food planned for tomorrow.

I'll add pics tomorrow it is taking forever to upload.

Night.