Traditions & randomness of course.

I have come to notice that every year for the past (going on) 3 years, January and February have been pretty crappy months. Something always seem to happen during the beginning months.

I am going to keep praying that things finally change, or that this could be the last year where something unfortunate happens.

I pray this is not becoming a tradition for me.

 

So I am attempting to change things. I am letting go of things I no longer need or want in my life.

 

Like I've said in my previous post, I am going to be selfish this year and focus on my needs and wants. I don't care if others agree or frown upon that, it's my life not theirs.

 

It is something that is hard for me to do, because I am a giver. I try to give to others, help others, do everything I can, but I am so burnt out it is taking a major toll on me and my health.

 

My weight loss has been going pretty good. On days that I don't workout, I try to meet a goal of at least 6,000 steps for that day. Or I try to super clean haha. Same thing right?!

 

I started school this past Saturday and I'm already having issues. None of my classes are showing up online except for my math...of course. SO I have to figure that issue out, not an easy task if I say so myself.

 

I'm currently trying to simplify my life, and have been super cleaning. So far, I've gotten through a little bit of my closet, school books, makeup, most of the kids clothes, and some random papers. Not bad for the start of the year.

 

Next up are dressers, shoes, and beauty products.

 

Speaking of traditions,

Some traditions I am hoping to create this year are:

1. Read at least one book a month

2. Pick an area each month, and deep clean through whatever it is.

3. At least a weekly family game night, and a monthly family movie night

4. Read the bible, and write notes, and eventually pass it on to my children.

5. Go thrift shopping with my kiddos, and really teach them the value of a dollar. My mother was very good at teaching us the value of a dollar by having us work and pay for certain things. My eyes were opened at that moment I made my first purchase and realized how quickly money goes.

 

Well I'm not sure where this blog post is going. It's truly all over the place. So I'll just leave it here. haha

 

Have a great day!

 



Raw.

Let's get a little raw here.

2015 was a shitty year.

It was the most challenging year I have yet experienced.

I don't wish any of the stuff I went through on anyone.

And the frustrating part is that I was not the cause of any of the stuff I went through. That is why I am currently re-evaluating who is exactly in my life.

I will NOT have another shitty year because of other people.

 

Let's go a bit deeper.

I gained back all the weight that I had originally lost except for maybe 5 pounds.

I am an emotional eater. It was a non stop roller coaster last year.

 

And something no body outside of immediate family and of course my bestie.

I am suffering from depression and anxiety.

It's not something I am proud of. I feel like I have failed myself to let myself get here. Some days are harder than others, but I'm just trying to take things one day at a time.

That is why I am back to my weight loss journey.

I am hoping that with losing some weight, that I will lose some of this emotion.

 

I know that this may be selfish, but I am going to make this year about myself.

I have given so much to other people that I have nothing left to give.

It's really tough to constantly have to smile at everyone like everything is ok, when in reality it's not.

But a part of it is my fault because I let certain people continue to walk all over me.

Well I'm done with that.

 

So I'm no longer going to lie, and just pretend everything is fine.

 

Things are changing and I am determined that they change for what's BEST FOR ME and MY KIDS and no one else.

 

2016 is where I get my shit together. And finally get rid of shit haha.